There is a disturbing level of self-denial that is a part of the discipleship of gay Christians who choose to remain committed to a traditional sexual ethic and the self denial that is a part of the lives of persecuted Christians who choose to remain committed to Jesus. However, the vast majority of Western Christians do not face either of these. If self-denial is an essential aspect of following Jesus, what does this mean for their lives. What does it look like?

I have been thinking more about how common aspects of Christian faith have an element of self-denial. I already blogged about how the call to gratitude requires self-denial in the midst of difficult circumstances, (Thanksgiving and Cross Bearing) I also see how trusting God has a degree of self denial.

I will illustrate this in this Advent season with the story of Zechariah in Luke 1. The angel Gabriel appears to Zechariah and announces “Do not be afraid, Zechariah, for your prayer has been heard, and your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you shall call his name John.  And you will have joy and gladness, and many will rejoice at his birth,” But Zechariah has difficulty trusting that this will be true, particularly given their old age. “How shall I know this? For I am an old man, and my wife is advanced in years.” We crave certainty and do not want to be put in a position of trust in something that is outside of our control. Taking on the risk of painful disappointment requires self-denial when we are asked to trust God because we want to protect ourselves from harm.

Gabriel appears exasperated with Zechariah’s hesitancy to trust. “I am Gabriel. I stand int he presence of God, and I was sent to speak to you and to bring you this good news.” We can understand that exasperation. Zechariah is in the Holy of Holies and is being visited by an angel. Is this really not enough to believe that this is a word from God that can be trusted?

But I think that behind this hesitancy is a life time of bitter disappointment in trusting God for a child. A lifetime of a longing and a hope that only yielded pain and sadness month after month. Zechariah is being asked to resurrect that hope. Later in the story, Elizabeth praises Mary’s trust in the word spoken to her, “And blessed is she who believed that there would be a fulfillment of what was spoken to her from the Lord.” This is a clear contrast with Zechariah. Yet, I am sympathetic to Zechariah. He is old and Mary is young. Mary has not had the experiences of disappointment that life has held for Zechariah. It is harder for Zechariah to believe and trust.

And I think this is true in the Christian life. We might think that it is easier to trust God as we get older because we have experiences of His faithfulness. But we also have experiences of trusting Him for something that we longed for and felt strongly that He was going to provide, only to face crushing disappointment. These may have been times when we were encouraged to trust God for those outcomes as an act of faith with the expectation that our faith would be rewarded.

We do not talk about these faith weakening experiences as much as the faith strengthening ones, but they are there and do impact us. Our natural desire for self protection causes us to be hesitant to trust God. How do we know that this will not be another time of hurt? And we shrink back from trusting because we have these experiences of not being able to be confident in certain outcomes. If we cannot be confident in outcomes, then our self, our flesh, does not want to risk trusting God.

Given that this is how life is, trusting God requires self denial, acting differently than our flesh wants to act. It requires stepping out in faith and trust in God without knowing the outcome of that step. We have to deny our natural desire for self protection in order to do that. This is what Zechariah is being asked to do. What Gabriel announced was good news, but there was an element of taking up his cross for Zechariah to believe it. Where are we like Zechariah in our lives?

I would love to connect with you about these posts if they have stirred any thoughts or questions. Take a minute, shoot me an email at bo@leavenedlives.org, and let’s see where that takes us.